Winter is better when you lean in, physically and mentally. And up until last week’s instruction on pruning at The Great Dixter Winter Symposium — this season, I hadn’t.
So Much For That
Those of you who remember the writing I did last year on GardenRant and the daily challenge I undertook on Instagram to showcase the winter garden and winter gardening may also remember that my enthusiasm for the wonders of the colder months was seemingly boundless.
I wasn’t making it up or creating content out of whole cloth. I was simply, sincerely, connected. And that attitude has been pretty consistent over the last few years. I relish the time winter gives me to slow down, take stock, and emphasize the little miracles that make the cold months special.
Not so much this year.
Yes, it’s been a titch colder. Yes, we’ve had more snow. Yes, the deer have been more active. And these are all great excuses for a piss-poor attitude — and certainly repeated by others who appear to be just as cold and miserable as I have been.
EXCEPT
Here’s what’s also true.
- I haven’t been walking every day.
- I haven’t been actively working or observing my garden every day.
- I haven’t been weight or cardio training every week.
Instead, the majority of my time outside has been spent
- Taking a puppy out to pee in 11F at 3.30am in a bathrobe and parka;
- Mournfully surveying deer damage when I collect precious eggs;
- Wrapping the carcasses of trees and shrubs that are left with frostbitten hands;
- Fighting cold winds in shopping center parking lots instead of natural areas.
Fighting the Loop
In previous years, I instinctively approached the first list as non-negotiable habits for a healthier body and a healthier attitude. This year, I got off track around the Christmas rush, and somehow came back to them as exceptionally negotiable — tasks that required precious time. Time I couldn’t give them.
It’s easy to do, but lack of physical activity creates a deadly feedback loop you don’t want to be toying with in February. As Tony Robbins preaches, “When your energy level drops, negative thoughts increase.” And this is true no matter how old you are. In the first scenario, you’re the conductor of the train. In the second, you’re the railroad track.
A Great Dixter Intervention
I’ll spare you the swearing that’s been happening from the front door to the car door. But it hasn’t been pretty, grateful, or Insta-worthy.
Thankfully, Smart Summer Marianne pre-planned a two-week trip at the beginning of this month to the UK to look at late winter gardens and attend a winter pruning symposium at Great Dixter with eight other intrepid souls from the US and the UK.
This meant that I had to walk (a lot) every day. I was layering up and leaning in to harsh winds, snow flurries, and cold rain in pursuit of beautiful winter gardens. I was taking advantage of early mornings by the sea to watch the sun rise after a bracing hike; or wringing out the last of the day picking pebbles off a beach at dark. I was putting on yet another layer between strong cups of tea to spend another four hours outside expanding my pruning techniques; and laughing a lot in the company of wonderful people whilst doing it.
Cold, happy and victorious over a massive rambling rose – from left Luke Senior, me, and Karl Suchy
Accountability is a great way of finding your way out of a tough mental space. No way was I going to disappoint fellow symposium attendees or indeed, Fergus Garrett.
Consequently, in the midst of all that physical activity and companionship – the act of moving became non-negotiable again. I started to see the winter for the unique joys and opportunities it holds. Core warm. Eyes open.
A beautiful winter bouquet picked from the garden of snowdrop hunting hosts, Felicity & Alan Down.
Happiness Is a Choice
Back at home there’s still deer damage (even more). It’s still ridiculously cold, and it’s snowing as I type this. But I’m happy to say I’ve jolted the needle out of the groove and I’m back to feeling panicked that there’s only one week of February left, instead of feeling despondent that there’s still a week of February left.
A bit of forced joy seemed appropriate upon my return home.
Over the course of my life I’ve met people plagued by sad circumstances, but bright as the sun above; and people whose life is going well by all outside measures, yet miserable as hell. It’s become clear in my own life that faced with tough circumstances, choosing to be happy will set me on a better course — even though it may not come naturally to my more cynical nature.
But this year I’ve also cemented my understanding that strong physical activity every day is non-negotiable if I want the strength to choose. – MW
My dictionary tells me that “titch” is not quite the word you were looking for, even though it is primarily a british term.
Perhaps it’s time to add the Urban Dictionary to your internet searches. – MW
That was an excellent piece of writing. Don’t be so damn picky.
Hear, hear.
Well timed. Thanks. I’ve been in a similar space, knowing that physical activity was what was needed, and yet inexplicably unable to break the cycle (obstinacy? laziness? mild depression)? I’m hoping that seeing your success will give me the push I need, along with the reminder of my super stimulating stint at Dixter a few years ago, where I learned that it is all achievable, just need to get out there…or at least, bemoaning the state of the world does not seem to be accomplishing anything for my state of mind!
Excellent winter post.
It has been the coldest winter in 67 yrs in So east PA…, so yes, gave up daily walks…but I feel much more energized after reading this…..Thank you!
I meant to say 6 yrs in Pa!
I echo the comments above. It is not just me feeling sluggish. Thanks for the prompt. I do so miss my garden.
I’ve missed “real” winter and welcomed this one. Not that I spent much time outside in it, but I think the garden enjoyed the deep freeze. Last 3 seasons the ground here has not frozen in Dec. Not normal. this was the first winter for me since retiring from teaching. My old dog had to go on insulin so I took the excuse to hole up with him, make his food, give the shots with lots of love and patience, take small slow walks when we could, especially in the snow we both love. I didn’t sign up on the sub list and for the first time the entire winter was my own. I tossed coffee grounds on the asparagus,but otherwise the garden was on its own too.
The dog is doing well, flowers are sprouting and,we are both eager to come out of hibernation and scratch around in the dirt.. Everything benefits from a good long winter rest.
I know I’m coming late to the party here but I will still chime in. I don’t to whom I should attribute this but I’ve heard “there is no bad weather, only bad clothing choices” or something like that. It’s true. This winter has been, up, down, up, down, down, cold, wet, sunny, windy…etc. But! Husband and I still try to get out at least 3-5 times a week to walk or x-country ski. It’s amazing what a difference it makes. At 70, I’m sure I’ll be more flexible once the real gardening begins…in about a month. Sigh. Carry on and keep walking.