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Poetry for a Leaf Blower Nation

Guest Rants in Verse by Jennifer Martenson For Whom the Leaf Blower Blows Consumer grade cost cutters available in mildly indifferent and turbo screw all y’all models* shift the burden of debris faster than you can say externality *inline deregulators sold separately   Prélude à l’après-midi d’un leaf blower Gunning at dawn as if to […]

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Posted by on March 12, 2013 at 7:47 am   This post has 24 responses.

A Gardening Boomer’s Equipment Wish-List

Guest Rant by Shenandoah Kepler I’m a Baby Boomer and am told that just as we changed the work environment as we entered it, we’re now changing the nature of retirement and aging. So, have you noticed that you can now go into most big-box hardware stores and find...

Read more in: Guest Rants, Taking Your Gardening Dollar
Posted by on February 17, 2013 at 10:24 am   This post has 26 responses.

In defense of garden cats

As a gardening veterinarian, I feel obligated to defend our feline friends against the recent onslaught of poor publicity directed towards them.  I’m referring of course, to news reports that stem from a January 29, 2013 article by Scott Loss, et al in Nature Communications, titled “The impact of free-ranging...

Read more in: Guest Rants, Ministry of Controversy
Posted by on February 14, 2013 at 8:34 am   This post has 63 responses.

Celebrating Winter’s Suckiness

Enduring winter in Kentucky is like sitting at the stop light, fiddling around trying to find a radio station, waiting for the red light to turn green. Eventually, spring arrives, just not soon enough. There is, however, a little consolation for all gardeners who are anxious to kick-start spring....

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Posted by on February 8, 2013 at 8:24 am   This post has 2 responses.

Win a bouquet from an American Rose Farm – and keep Valentine’s Day local

by Debra Prinzing  Read on to WIN ONE DOZEN AMERICAN ROSES Post a comment here about why American-grown flowers are important to you! You might just win one dozen gorgeous roses from Oregon or California! We have rose donations from Eufloria Flowers and Peterkort Roses. Two winners will be...

Read more in: Books, Guest Rants, It's the Plants, Darling, Taking Your Gardening Dollar, What's Happening
Posted by on February 7, 2013 at 5:34 am   This post has 90 responses.

Stop the Madness! Crimes Against Horticulture

Guest Rant by Billy Goodnick Come with me to the imaginary hearing called by the Senate Subcommittee on Crimes Against Horticulture. The hallowed chamber shudders as my gavel slams down, calling the room to order. I delight as the company reps and industry lobbyists squirm in dread anticipation of...

Read more in: CRRRITIC, Guest Rants
Posted by on January 24, 2013 at 8:03 am   This post has 56 responses.

Pen Pals No More

I’m not much of a pack rat, but I have saved old letters from the past thirty-five years. Gardeners, who it seems seldom had a boring day, dominate the files. Among them are letters from Christopher Lloyd and Elizabeth Lawrence, but I especially enjoyed rereading my letters from David...

Read more in: Guest Rants, Unusually Clever People
Posted by on January 17, 2013 at 6:43 am   This post has 6 responses.

The American Lawn Predates the Civil War

Susan asked in a post whether we should blame Frederick Law Olmsted for the popularity of lawn in the U.S., and we have an answer by guest ranter Thomas Mickey. Recent posts have appeared on this site that blasted the American obsession with the lawn.  I have no problem...

Read more in: Guest Rants, Lawn Reform
Posted by on January 15, 2013 at 1:52 pm   This post has 6 responses.

Holiday Parties with Non-Gardeners.
You Can Make It If You Try.

Too many times over the decades, even knowing that it won’t end well, I have herded party captives into a corner, hoping for a mad gardener conversion. The compliant lambs sip Sauvignon Blanc, and chat about their boxwoods, then turn deaf when I start in on the wonders of...

Read more in: Guest Rants, It's the Plants, Darling
Posted by on December 20, 2012 at 8:02 am   This post has 6 responses.

Zombies ate my garden—ch-ching!

As near as I can tell, the gardening industry has overlooked a vast area of marketing that has the potential to start a gardening revolution among young folk and thus grow a new generation of gardeners in this country.  Following in the footsteps of a current wildly successful television series, The Walking Dead, and...

Read more in: Guest Rants, Taking Your Gardening Dollar
Posted by on December 13, 2012 at 1:36 pm   This post has 8 responses.

An Almighty Will to Propagate

“Why do you love what you do?” This was a question posed last month at the annual conference of the Eastern Region of the International Plant Propagators Societyin the Brandywine Valley, Pennsylvania. The joyful reply came from Joe LaMent (a fellow whose name in no way fits his personality)...

Read more in: Guest Rants, Unusually Clever People
Posted by on November 22, 2012 at 8:35 am   This post has 5 responses.

My Dirty Little Secret

Dear Penthouse Letters: I never thought it could happen to me. I mean, me? S&M? NO WAY. Then I realized… Gardening, for me, was masochism. It’s true. For years, I was a virtual slave to plants I lusted after but couldn’t grow. How voluptuous were lilacs and peonies when...

Read more in: Books, Guest Rants
Posted by Andrew Keys on November 15, 2012 at 6:54 am   This post has 76 responses.

The Undaunted and Undented Osage Orange

The Osage orange tree doesn’t have a large following but I have become a big fan. I love its beautiful, glossy green foliage and its yellow stained wood. And there’s something even more irresistibly loveable about the misshapen, softball-sized pale green fruit that looks like an alien’s brain. The...

Read more in: Guest Rants, It's the Plants, Darling
Posted by on October 25, 2012 at 7:55 am   This post has 19 responses.

Garden Literature goes Up in Smoke

Dear friends, just as there is no hiding the fact that Professor Roush is a rose nut, there is also no suspense to the revelation that I am an entrenched bibliophile.  My love of printed and bound material stretches far back into my childhood, to that happy time when I was still an only child and...

Read more in: Guest Rants, Ministry of Controversy
Posted by on October 11, 2012 at 9:00 am   This post has 27 responses.

Low-Hanging Fruit, Part Two

Back in April I reported on the surprising blooms on a pair of semi-dwarf apple trees I’d given up for dead after a freak October snowstorm had ripped their roots out the ground, leaving the trees on their sides. I left the trees in the ground, not really expecting...

Read more in: Eat This, Feed Me, Guest Rants
Posted by William Alexander on October 4, 2012 at 5:42 am   This post has one response.

Wilson Pickett and the Pink Rose

I owe my love of pink flowers to Wilson Pickett. The rhythm and blues singer was my high school cosmic everything. Teenage boys often feel they are irrelevant. Or at least they once did. In the mid-60s, I played a white soul man to prove the point. When I...

Read more in: Guest Rants, It's the Plants, Darling
Posted by on September 20, 2012 at 7:33 am   This post has 8 responses.

My climate, my choice

The ample rain two weeks ago was enough to green up the buffalo grass and provide some much needed relief to the perennials here in Kansas.  It also brought some relief to area gardeners, not from the sweltering heat, which continues to stress my garden and its gardener daily, but it...

Read more in: Guest Rants, Taking Your Gardening Dollar
Posted by on September 13, 2012 at 10:05 am   This post has 14 responses.

Horticultural Cowboys

  Guest Post by Allen Bush Willie Nelson warns, in his song of the same name, “Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be cowboys…”   Then he offers a way out: “Make ‘em lawyers and doctors and such.” Willie, I have a better idea. Make ‘em gardeners and...

Read more in: Guest Rants, It's the Plants, Darling
Posted by on August 30, 2012 at 7:18 am   This post has 13 responses.

J.C. Raulston and the Green Closet

Please welcome Bobby Ward, author of Chlorophyll in His Veins: J. C. Raulston, Horticultural Ambassador. Recently Amy Stewart commented on Clyde Phillip Wachsberger’s book Into the Garden With Charles, a gardening memoir of Wachsberger and his partner, Charles Dean. The late J. C. Raulston would have greatly appreciated Wachsberger’s...

Read more in: Guest Rants, Unusually Clever People
Posted by on August 23, 2012 at 3:23 am   This post has 17 responses.

Keep Your Garden Out of My Face

Guest Rant by Billy Goodnick  It was a dark and foggy summer night. Biff the Wonder Spaniel and I set out for our last neighborhood stroll, green poopy bag at the ready. It’s a good thing I didn’t have my nose buried in my iPhone, catching up on the...

Read more in: Designs, Tricks, and Schemes, Guest Rants
Posted by on August 16, 2012 at 8:33 am   This post has 61 responses.
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