Shut Up and Dig

Paris Hilton Goes Green, Totally Makes Up for Everything

Paris
Remember Paris Hilton?  She was that rich kid who…oh, never mind.  I’m sure we were all heartened and inspired by her Nelson Mandela-like prison term and all the wisdom and insight she accumulated therefrom.  You may recall that she decided to sober up and do something with her life, perhaps something involving breast cancer, multiple sclerosis, or "not being cute."  All lofty goals.

But wait!  What about the environment?  That’s so awesome!  Now the ex-con has found a different and totally better new leaf to turn over.  Ford gave her a hybrid vehicle (presumably the Ford Escape SUV, which gets an astonishing 30 mpg on the freeway), and all the pieces fell into place.  She said:

"I’m getting a car from Ford, a hybrid one. They gave me one. So, I
think driving hybrid cars is the new way to go, and recycling."

She’s going to use the power of MySpace to carry out her green revolution.  "I’m going to start writing about ways kids can
help save the world, because anyone can do it, no matter how old you
are or where you’re from. I just want this world to be a better place
for my grandchildren. I’m scared with what’s going on in the environment, so I hope people will help and make a difference. Everyone can."

The lesson here?  When Ford calls and offers you a free hybrid SUV that gets worse mileage than a gas-powered Corolla, you tell them yes and call your publicist.  Got that, kids? We all have to do our part.

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Posted by on July 26, 2007 at 1:50 pm, in the category Shut Up and Dig.
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3 responses to “Paris Hilton Goes Green, Totally Makes Up for Everything”

  1. In all fairness to Ms. Hilton the 30 mpg is much better then her Bentley Gt’s 10 mpg.

  2. This is such a very sad example of a wasted life. I am pathetic that I even listen/read the news about someone who has yet to find a purpose beyond making herself happy and making headlines. It’s like watching a train wreck.

  3. chuck b. says:

    Wait, Paris wants to have children?

    I wonder if she’ll buy them in Malawi, like Madonna. Is Malawi still hot?

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